Wanted: True Friendship

So day 2 of my kidney stone process has barely begun and I'm already in pain. But the pain isn't in my side, it's lower. I'm assuming this means that the stone is passing into my bladder which I hope means I can pass it soon and have this whole ordeal over with! ugh!

It was nice to have someone with me yesterday. Lisa was kind enough to stay pretty much the whole day with me. Now today.... is another story. I got up at like 7:30 only God knows why! Then fed the dogs and such, grabbed the paper, read some articles and took a shower. I even started some laundry. But it's 10am and I'm bored and wanting to not be alone today. Now I just checked my facebook and I have found a friend of mine could be completely moved in to a new place in Charleston SC by this time next year! I always new they would move there because she has divulged this information to me before. But since I consider her one of my BEST FRIENDS, I guess I wish she had told me in person and I didn't have to find out on facebook with everyone else. She has a new job and such so I understand she can't get together as much anymore because she's got longer hours now. But still I sometimes feel like I'm just a convenience friendship to her. Like she only talks to me when her hubby is about to leave or while he's gone. I really wish I could meet some girls who would be my friend no matter who was around or not. I understand that when your husband is home you want to spend time with him. Believe me I get it because yes I admit I have not made plans with girlfriends because I knew my hubby was in town. So yes I get it. But, whether my hubby is around or not, I try to make plans with my friends as soon as we're both available. Maybe I have too high of standards, or maybe I just haven't found the right friends. I don't know. I just wish people could grow up, be mature and be a true friend in every sense of the word.

Well now that I have ranted I have a headache. I've already taken a percoset this morning so I can't take another until 3pm. But maybe I'll take some tylenol and take a nap. It's not like any one's going to call me or ask to hang out today. No one ever does.

"A successfuly ER trip" an oxymoron????

So, last night starting at about 10pm I experienced severe pain in my right side. I took some tylenol to try and get some good sleep. Well, that did not happen! I did not get much sleep at all. I attempted to go to work this morning and I just broke down in front of my boss. I felt AWEFUL about it! But my boss is absolutely wonderful and so understanding. She told me to go get checked out and get better. So I drove myself home (harder to do than i thought). My friend Lisa brought me to the ER because i just couldn't stop crying because of the pain in my right side, the guilt i felt over my job, missing my hubby (because of course this happens right after he leaves!) and just over-all exhaustion. We got to the ER at like 7:45. I was taken back right away because of my pain, plus it wasn't that busy. I had a urine test, an ultrasound of my side, and then a CT scan. At the end of all the tests I found out I have a Kidney Stone causing my pain. So at this point its 11am and I've been doing tests and waiting for 3 hours. I hadn't been hungry so I barely ate this morning. So after all that I was tired and super hungry. Lisa and I were thinking I might have appendicitis which would've required surgery obviously and I wouldn't have been able to eat! So thankfully I didn't have that because I was starving! So The ER gave me 2 prescriptions; percocet for pain and a dialation medication to relax my bladder so that the stone will pass easier (ewwwwww). Thankfully I had a very good friend with me to help me out all day. She drove me to the ER and back home again. We had lunch and we both took naps because we were so tired. So all in all, I was seen quickly in the ER, I wasn't alone, I got medication to help me feel better, and I had a nap. Today was a decent day, except for the severe pain part. But honestly, is it an oxymoron to say you had a successful trip to the ER??? Well, whatever you believe or feel, I am glad to have a friend to accompany me so I didn't feel so lonely in such a crazy experience. I've never had kindey stones before or felt pain like that. So I'm glad I got a diagnosis and a treatment plan. I think about how long it took to diagnose my PCOS and I was so afraid I was going to be the crazy girl with the mysterious pain in her right side. So I really am just glad to know what was causing it and how I can get better. I guess, thankful is the word of the day.

GLEE - Il FlashMob

New Leaf!

So my hubby left this morning. He'll be gone quite awhile. I cried so hard last night and I cried again once I got home from dropping him off at the ship. I probably should have taken the day off today but I guess it was as much a blessing as a curse to have had to go to work today. so while this is my day to be sulking and mopy, I know I will be better tomorrow because life does go on.

So this entry is named "New leaf" because of my last statement: "life goes on". So starting tomorrow, I WILL get up extra early and work out. And tonight I even made a healthy dinner or stir fry veggies (zuccini, squash, carrots, and onions) with some chicken that I had my hubs throw in a Crockpot yesterday. There is no more soda in my house; all my veggies are fresh and locally grown & bought; my meal are prepared without oils and butters and such. I need to feel healthy and feel good about what's going into my body in order to feel good about my body and my life in general. So, thus the new leaf! This weekend I hope to clean out our office and get rid of a lot of junk as well donate a bunch of items to the Salvation Army as well as rip all my old CD's onto my new computer so I can get rid of them too! So, to say the least I have things to do to keep me busy. While I miss my husband and enjoy thinking about him and actively missing him, I know that if I linger too long on the subject it will dominate my mind and my day will turn for the worse because I will miss him too much. I mean no offense to anyone, especially my hubby, in saying that but sometimes when you think about just ONE person for too long your mood changes. Sometimes it even interfers with progress you were making. This is what I am trying to say. Anyways. I also am hoping to keep more up to date with this blog. I know I know! I've said that before and I do well for like a week and then don't post for a month or so! But I swear!!!! I will try to do better to post more often. Like I said, anyways! It is time for me to go to bed. I need to get up early to workout and then do my usual routine before work!

drama, drama, drama....

So to my not so many readers, I have had lots of drama going on in my life. I've found out that the people I thought were my friends were only fairweather friends. And it hurts because these people were supposedly my best friends. What makes it worse is that my husband is in and out and I have no family in this area. He is finding the same thing with some of his friends whom he works with! So right now, the only thing keeping us here is his job (which he's looking to change) and my job. I'm not going to get a better job anywhere else. I make good money to watch some amazing children. They're all boys so basically I get paid to make sure they don't kill themselves or each other. And the family is great! If we were to move to a new duty station or something, I'd have to find another job or be a stay at home wife. But I don't know if we could afford for me to stay at home all day with no job. Plus we bought our house here, but i think to solve that issue, we'd just rent it out to someone. But i'm telling you I have no support system here and it's breaking my heart. It feels exactly like it did when I lost my "best" friend back in college. She was a friend from my hometown whom I'd known for years! Now I feel like it's happening all over again. So right now, life is drama-filled and really up in the air.

I do have some good news! Well, sort of! My hubby and I have decided to be more eco-friendly and healthy. We went shopping at a local farmers market so we're helping our local economy. We're eating fresh produce and sometimes organic! And we're using reusable materials and bags and such. So I'm very proud of us for making this decision to be eco-friendly, healthier and support our local growers! And I seriously got some good deals. I'm so excited about doing this! I can't wait to go back. :)